Monday, April 9, 2012

If not now, then when?

About a week ago, Kim Klassen challenged us with this question: 'if not now, then when?' I can relate to that well because I am a great procrastinator (I procrastinated nearly a week on this post!). I even rationalize my procrastination habits by telling myself that eventually I do my best work when it is at the last minute. Although I do usually manage to get things done when I have a deadline, even if I put it off, I can't really say it is my best work--sometimes that doesn't matter because it is just 'work', ya know? It doesn't have to be good; it just has to be done, but I often save the hardest part for last because I want to check off my list so I feel like I made some progress, but it is the hard things that matter--that is where the real work is.

I am a worker--always have been. I work and work and I can work really, really hard, but as hard as I work, it is not usually on the right things. I work on the things I know I can do and sometimes on the things I just have to do because that is life. I get it done.

What tends to get me is procrastinating (or maybe it is more of being  reluctant and afraid) about the other things in my life . . . the BIG things; the things I want to do, but am too scared to do--like find a new job (even though mine is fine, really, but it is boring and uninspiring, but so hard to take the plunge into something I rather be doing--plus I'm not even sure what that is); like really get into art and actually sell some stuff--maybe even find my niche; like put myself out there--really ask people to look at my stuff--really self-promote (so scared of that!). . . . but I want to start . . . something . . . if not NOW, then when?

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